2011-Beam us up, Scotties!

by Julian Westaby.

Barbarella, dressed for the M8 winter commute

Yup, we can’t believe it either. As wee boys and girls, we thought that by 2011, it would all be Hovver boots, ‘Bacofoil’ suits and ‘nourishment cartridges’ for lunch. People would be making love by touching their fingertips, ‘Barbarella’ style and communications would be by some form of sophisticated mind kinesis, not a blinkin’ QWERTY keyboard.

With knitting and hand crafts making a comeback, a return to carefully-provenanced ‘slow food’ and JLS launching their own condoms, it’s not quite turned out like that! Even the archaic QWERTY, which was invented in 1878, it’s still very much with us, albeit incorporated into some fairly ‘Star Trek’-looking ‘communicators’.

There’s been lots of hi-tech happenings obviously but it was the more elemental nature of what Mother Earth can throw at us which had an real effect on the brave new world of communications. The coldest December ever made us realise that it’s the pathetic organic bit in the middle (us) which is prone to failure, along with the non-virtual parts of the glorious Scottish infrastructure. Hopefully, we’ve learnt a few things and we’ll get better!

However, no more talk of ‘challenging times’ and all that baloney, (we had enough of that last year). It’s onwards and upwards. We’ve got the latest in wellie technology, invested in some cutting-edge fleecies and have some thermals which are allowing us to remain very social. So, come on World, come on 2011, were READY FOR YOU!